Internal Sequin Issues: New Seasons

I must go ahead an agree with Paige, I am glad to see October go. More importantly, I am hopeful for November to be a better month.

October came with a lot of positive changes for me. I not only continued on my firm stance to spend my money more wisely, but I also improved my diet and exercise. I am welcoming November in having lost a few pounds, discovered a few new routines, and have welcomed sore muscles to my weekly routine. All of these things have lead to my head feeling a bit clearer, but I still have a few cobwebs left to clear out.

In the spirit of being honest, I must admit that for the last year and a half or so, I have bounced between doctors and websites, and support groups and books to figure out why I just don't feel right. After months of non-answers and so many trip to the pharmacy for a different approach, I am feeling no better than when I started this journey in 2008. I have reached a point now however, where I understand that there may not be a one word answer that will cure my confusion, and there may not be a magic pill that can calm the storm that rages inside of me. I hope the next few months will bring relaxation to my head, a few appointments with some not yet visited 'experts', and ideally soon after an acceptance. I seem to have come to terms with the ins and outs of my body, and don't feel the need to have a doctor explain those any longer. Their medical books seem to have left me without answers. I do hope though that finding some trusted medical advisers though, can help me calm the anxiety that my sickness has brought along with it. I want to spend the next few months quieting my fear of the storm. I may not be able to prevent the next wave from crashing into my little boat, but I can figure out how to prepare for each wave, and how to better ride them out.

It hasn't just been my insides that seem to have 'checked out' for a bit now, as October brought upon me a lack of inspiration. My magazines even sat for weeks before being un-opened! My outfit choices stuck around the safety of comfort, and the crafty ideas that floated in my head for so long seemed to have settled into a filing cabinet in my mind. For a few days I enjoyed the quite of not having ideas and concepts running a muck in my mind, but soon after I started to miss them.

With all of that off my chest, and this outfit I liked, but couldn't bring myself to love out of my blogging folder, I welcome November in with a cheers. This month won't come and go much slower, but with a trip to visit my sister, and my birthday on the horizon I hope that this month will be a bit softer. Goodbye October, Hello sweet sweet November.