Recently I have had quite a few run-ins with the rules of social etiquette, and each run-in has left me thinking. It all started a few weeks ago, when I did a guest post on a local blog. He does not write a 'fashion' blog, but was hosting a fashion themed week in hopes of adding a fashion writer to his blog. I took some cues from some conversation we had had prior to writing the post, and than sent him my information. I included the picture you see below, of my outfit inspired by Khloe Kardashian. Not only was my post ( or most of the fashion posts to be frank) not well received, but I was shocked to discover that most of the commenters felt it necessary to leave their thoughts on Khloe's weight and not on my writing. Not only were they commenting on my post, but on other parts of his blog as well, and each comment ( except for Lyddie's! Thanks for being so sweet!) was about people's distain for my choice in inspiration. I was a bit shocked at people's opinion, but chalked it up to other blogs not fashion related simply not having readers as sweet.
For the last few weeks I've been working at a conference. One of our projects was to gather as a small group and discuss some different situations and come to a conclusion as a group as to our thoughts on the information we had been given. I had expected that gathering as a small group of strangers and agreeing on anything would be difficult. What I hadn't expected was just how different we all would view the rules of social grace. One of the group members would become red in the face and yell each time someone would ask him to explain his position on a matter. He would yell at both the older men and the women with just the same tone and fury. While each participant had handled the situation differently, it was his reaction and lack of concern for people around him that caught me the most off guard.
While having dinner with our friends this past weekend, one of our good friends and I got into a heated debate about musicians and their power of persuasion and things of the such. He and I are both people who tend to enjoy deep conversation and our opposite viewpoints lead to a lively discussion. Once we had left for the evening Johnny mentioned that while our friend and I may have been enjoying the conversation, it had left everyone else in the room feeling uncomfortable. I realized then that I had done what the group participant had done, and what all of those blog readers had done. I followed my own set of social etiquette rules, and in doing so left everyone around me shaking their heads. But what exactly are the standard rules of etiquette these days? It seems as if many people establishes their own rules and modifies them to various situations, but then what should you do once you realize that your rules aren't quite meshing with the rules of those around you ( as the the group participant, and later I had done). Is there a protocol for social grace?